Original Taylor's Ham or Pork Roll Stories®

Exactly how far should a 100% Customer Satisfaction go?

True, humorous, examples of what has been covered by the guarantee in the past but are no longer:

(Voted our favorite so far) If your non-Jersey Girl wife orders a pork roll for you, a true Jersey Guy, it arrives 11 days before Christmas, and not knowing what a pork roll was, she lets it sit wrapped under your tree without refrigeration until December 25th, we are sorry, but this year we cannot guarantee and replace it. 

She thought it was like beef jerky - pork roll jerky? 

A woman ordered hard rolls for her husband's birthday in May and having never seen a hard roll, she let them rise to the size of a soccer ball. Her husband called the night of his birthday and said he'd eaten a "a Babka, pita, hard roll" for dinner.  He was laughing when he called that night to tell us the directions didn't specify how high to let it rise in inches, "to the size of a medium hard roll," but his wife was not laughing. He then explained the huge dough ball collapsed in the oven and came out flat like a pita but he ate it anyway. We did replace them, and we also updated the instructions that very same day.

If you fail to check your mail box or porch for two weeks after your order from JerseyPorkRoll.com arrives. "I didn't expect it to arrive so soon. I thought it would take weeks to get shipped." (Unfortunately, this happens more than we can believe) We normally ship on the same or very next shipping day, so you must be ready for the arrival. 

You are also not covered if your delivery address is a cluster box and your package is stolen by wild animals or anything else. (This has also happened.) The shredded box, gel packs, and pork roll wrapping were supposedly located more than a mile from the box in Nevada. Since you know UPS or the USPS will be dropping it off, ask for it to be dropped in a safe spot. 

Northern States: Your mail carrier might be hesitant to leave your package when it is below 0 outside. Packages have been brought back into the post office and kept warm to prevent them from being frozen just in case "PERISHABLE" means flowers, goldfish, or hamsters. You have to leave a note or they might overzealously protect your pork roll!  (Again, this is a true story from Bill D. of Aspen, CO and Richard of Bozeman MT)

If you order the pork roll as a gift for your boyfriend, it arrived on Thursday afternoon, but his gift to you was a last minute surprise long weekend away in Mexico, you are no longer entitled to a refund or replacement because your pork roll sat for five days on your porch in the blazing sun of Southern California while you two were in Cozumel. We warned you it was on the way!

You are NOT covered when you order your package sent to your work address and it arrives on Monday but you call in sick until Thursday. It is your responsibility to tell your co-workers not to leave it on your office chair for four days. It arrived in 36 hours but you didn't arrive for work for five days!. 

We hope you've been amused by these true stories, but they are now no longer covered by the guarantee!
-Kate 

Kate and the Jersey Girls of JerseyPorkRoll.com/NJPorkRoll.com 

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